Most of the self defense training sessions are designed to deal with situations of physical violence. Thus, we practice defense exercises by scripting typical aggression (with seizure, simple threat, attempted punch, etc.), in order to prepare the brain to react to several situations and above all to avoid being paralyzed in front of the unknown.
self defense also includes a more theoretical teaching: biomechanics, stress management, dealing with verbal aggression, etc.
Today we’re going to deal with verbal violence and see why I advise you to integrate it in your self defense exercises.
Table of Contents
Verbal violence is an integral part of an aggression
Besides the “physical” dimension, an assault also has a psychological dimension, which is why a victim may also be shocked after having been a victim of verbal violence.
Indeed, not all of us are used to being addressed as such, and some people may feel very confused in such a situation, finding themselves unable to know how to react and how to start a possible dialogue with the perpetrator to reduce the tension.
There is still a positive aspect to this situation: when a perpetrator starts speaking, it might be a proof that his aim is apparently not to kill you. He expects something from you, which is why he bothers to threaten you verbally (an assailant who just wants to stab you with a knife will not bother to warn you of his approach).
Needless to say that you should cooperate as best as you can! Material goods are not worth as much as your life!
Still it is tricky to lower the tension in the middle of an attack, all the more when it is both physical and psychological.
Someone who is not prepared enough to face the reality of the street will be overwhelmed. The solution to increasing awareness is to train through properly scripted role-plays.
It’s not as easy as it sounds! Talking to each other (without even insulting each other) is quite destabilizing in class when you are with respectable and self-respecting people. There are a lot of social inhibitions at work, and even in such a setting it is difficult to give free rein to the beast inside you.
Verbal violence is a lure
Pay attention to the perpetrator’s comments only to a certain extent, and do not allow yourself to be overwhelmed by them! If he claims for something, you shall be able to understand what he wants, and that’s it. Everything else must be filtered. Insults shall go in one ear and out the other. These are simple words, the danger is elsewhere!
So don’t be struck by daunting words, threatening or insults. Don’t focus on futile details!
It is true that your ego tends to speak for yourself and people with a high ego are tempted to assume everything at face value, to puff up their chests and rush in to “restore their honor”. Well in reality they will most likely be the first to take a backhand. Indeed, acting this way, they will unconsciously fall in line with the perpetrator’s plan!
Be smarter than your perpetrator, don’t play his game and focus on the real danger: the way you are standing, the surroundings, the potential loopholes, etc.
If the perpetrator succeeds in taking psychological control over you, he will have achieved half (if not more) of the work.
Practicing your physical skills is essential to move with enough speed, but training your mind is essential to keep control of yourself and the situation. Someone with a fragile mind is condemned to undergo the circumstances and be at the mercy of his perpetrator, which is often counterproductive.
